My substitution for love.
I feel in our world today. The word love is thrown around too easily. Love is an intimate feeling and is reserved for the special person. By denying you are not in love with the person you are in a relationship means is not an insult to them. You still have feelings for them. Just… love is a feeling that is for that person whom you want to be with forever.
How can I love someone else if I can’t love myself?
Embrace it and run.
I am not one to take compliments to heart for being heartbroken is more painful than shutting it all out when its going good. Sometimes it is comforting to open up when I am the weakest and embrace their love.
I used to be so confident. I was sure of myself. I was skinny. I had good grades. I was always happy. I had many close friends. I loved life. I was close to my family. I was trusting.
Now its all gone. I have lost my confidence. I question every move I make. I am always self conscious. I have gained weight. I have bad grades. I am sad often. I have few friends - only three who I trust at all. I have distanced myself from my family. I tell them far less than I used to. I have lost my trust in people.
Yes, my communication skills have improved. Yes, I have become nicer and more sympathetic towards others. Yes, I have stronger values and stick firmly to my morals. But are these qualities worth compromising everything else?